I’ve recently ventured into the world of having a business Instagram and an unexpected benefit of this was coming across Morgan Harper Nichols’ page. She describes herself as an “autistic poet-artist creating daily reminders to help you make room to breathe.”
And her daily reminders have given me just that, room to breathe. The wording of that in itself is beautifully stated and not something I would have thought to say I need, but as soon as I read that it hit me that I need exactly that in my life. I love the chaos of being at home with my very active son and running my private practice.
Still, I have come across days where I close his door after putting him down for bed and am thankful my body automatically breathes for me because I’m not sure I would have remembered to do it for myself.
So I’ve continued to eagerly look at Morgan’s posts each day and utilize her reminders in helping make room to breathe. One of Morgan’s daily reminders that really struck me said, “Identify at least one area in your life where you choose to say: “I will not be in a rush. I will unapologetically take my time.”
And I have not been able to get this idea out of my head ever since. “…unapologetically take my time.” What does that even mean? What does that even look like?
I’ve lived my life praised and applauded for my productivity and it has successfully helped me numb and avoid numerous emotional experiences. Not that productivity in itself is bad, I’ve just used it as a go-to defense mechanism for quite some time. I’ve worked on this various times over the past few years in therapy, but I realized I’m still yet to progress to being able to unapologetically take my time in an aspect of my life.
I am grateful that Morgan included the word unapologetically, too. When I did start thinking through this, I realized that when there are areas of my life where I don’t progress as quickly, I am often apologizing to others and myself, or experiencing frustration towards myself that I’m going slower than I think I should be. I appreciate that it wasn’t just, “I will not be in a rush. I will take my time.” No, it’s, “I will unapologetically take my time.”
I haven’t yet landed on an area of my life to practice this, but I am consistently pondering it and am looking forward to eventually figuring that area out. For you, I hope you take time to sit with this, too, and reflect on an area of your life you already are doing this or work to identify an area you can start.
Kylie Larson, MA, LPC