As winter is meant to be a time to embrace the rhythm of rest, spring and summer seem to be the time to embrace the rhythm of doing. Nature comes alive, sunlight lengthens and the weather beckons us to enjoy it all outside.
It is a beautiful season to get out and do. But I came across a quote the other day from Sevim Kockaya that has resonated with me as I step into this season of doing. It said, “There is nothing in nature that blooms all year long, so do not expect yourself to do so.”
Much of my past is filled with attempts at doing it all. At the height of this, I was working full time, a full-time graduate student, heavily involved in volunteering at church and training for half marathons. It was crazy, to say the least. And at the root of all this fullness was a deep desire to be seen as good. I figured if I did everything I could and rarely said no when asked to do something, then perhaps at the end of the day, I could say I did good for the world… that I was good.
And I likely did, but I wasn’t grasping an important concept. I’m never meant to be doing it all, I’m only meant to be doing my part.
Much like nature passes the baton of beauty on and never holds it for itself all year long, I was never meant to hold the baton of doing all year long, either. Along my back fence, we have various flowers that bloom at different times. It starts with a beautiful yellow flower that lines the whole fence in the spring, and then it transitions to a striking orange flower in both corners in early summer, and then it moves to a green fullness in late summer. Each is beautiful, each I enjoy and each bloom for its time and then allows the next its turn.
Within Christianity, we see this idea as well. Scripture in the Bible (Romans 12:4-8) discusses how we are parts of a body. Each part is vital, but also only ever expected to serve its part. I was reading “Leaving Church” by Barbara Brown Taylor the other day. It’s her story of being a pastor in the church and eventually feeling called to step away and leave the church. She talks about how the Sabbath day is a great reminder of how we are only a part of the whole. For one whole day, we are told to rest. For many, we can’t. We get anxious, our to-do list runs through our head, we don’t find it relaxing, and we worry things are going to fall through the cracks if we aren’t doing things. But, that’s part of the point of the Sabbath. It’s a reminder to us that the world keeps going even if we rest. We aren’t the whole, we are only a part.
As I look at my past self, I can see the anxiousness that things wouldn’t get done if I wasn’t doing them. I saw myself as more important than apart. I also greatly feared what stopping would bring. Uncomfortable narratives entered my thoughts when I rested, rest was much more uncomfortable than filling my schedule to the brim was. But, living a lifestyle that we aren’t meant to catches up to us eventually, as did mine.
My life looks drastically different now. It is much less full, although still chaotic with a toddler. I say no much more often. And I embrace that I am only a part of all the systems around me. I’m never meant to carry the burden of being the whole. And, by embracing this, when it is my time to step up and carry the load, I can do so much more enjoyably, much more effectively, and with much more stamina.
So, as we step into the season of doing, go and do. We are meant to be productive and we are meant to contribute. It is good for the soul. But, through doing, remember that all that is asked of you is to do your part, we are never meant to be the whole.
Warmly,
Kylie Larson, MA, LPC
More resources…
Find Kylie’s reading commendations by clicking here.
